The one good thing about our flight back to the UK on Christmas Eve was Sky Mall. This fat magazine was the only thing that made me laugh on that flight (besides Despicable Me, but I’d already seen that on the way out to San Francisco. Still cute.)
Why was I so excited by this? If you’ve seen my previous posts about JML and Betterware, you’ll know I’ve got a bit of a thing for useless crap in magazines for home shopping. I’ve only picked out a few here, but I pretty much want everything. EVERYTHING.
Hey, remember when it was all icey and I didn’t fall over once? (I’m quite proud of that actually, considering I fell last year whilst wearing my big grippy wellies and couldn’t work at Christmas) I wish it was because I had used the “No Slip Ice Carpet”. You get two in the pack, so you could just keep moving the one you’re not walking on infront of you and never fall! Not practical you say? Well why not just get someone to carry you everywhere instead.
This one does actually work. I was watching “The View” (no shame) who had a section on about products advertised as being seen on TV. I was glued to the screen. This Touchless Paper Tower Holder is one for the germophobes. Perhaps those ones who are buying that touchless soap dispenser thats being advertised on TV at the moment? (“OMG THERE ARE GERMS ON THE DISPENSER!” Well, yeah, but you’re going to wash your hands anyway?)
Anyway. You wave your hand in one bit to dispense the paper towel, then in the other bit to cut it off, and then you punch it because you didn’t catch the paper towel in time and now its on the side and OMG GERMS GEEEEEEERMMMMMMMS
Need to take the dog in the car? Why not buy this pet seat for $99.95? (I’ve never seen Star Wars, but it reminds me of something that should be in it. Those big tall robots that they shoot things from? Yeah, those.)
I have to admit, there are some things that seem ridiculous, and then you get distracted by the cute little puppy on the sofa and want to order one. The PupSTEP Plus (which implies there were previous versions?) is to help your dog up onto the sofa or bed, instead of them trying to jump up, failing, and falling off. You’re not supposed to laugh when the dog falls off the bed you know.
This…this is just creepy. The pillows might be really comfortable, but why is the woman in a lace-y négligée?  Why is she holding a rose? Why have some of the petals fallen off? These questions will never be answered sadly.
Danni says
hahaaa! Oh Hayley these are bloomin fabulous.
I’m a bit of a bettware lover. My personal faves are those spider catchers that usually have a very fearful looking old woman in the background, trying to suck a spider into what is basically a vacuum for smurfs. CLASSIC!
Danni
xxx
daisychain says
I love you for this post haha. If I could make noise, I’d be laughing out loud. I love going through Betterware and making up new ads…or err, I have NO idea what it’s called but the random supplment you sometimes get in TV mags! x
Sophie says
This is a fabulously funny post. I love it. LOL.
I love the furniture ladder………..
http://cgdn.blogspot.com/
Harriet says
Oh gosh these are amazing! I don’t have a pet, but I kind of want the pet step anyway…!
Susan Kennedy says
Hahaha I love it. Always had a fondness for those kind of catalogs , but when I see the shopping channels late at night all these things start to look attractive..
Matt in the Hat says
The questions about the lady will never be answered but similar questions are answered at Catalogue Living here: http://catalogliving.net/
Sarah says
Actual LOLZ. Especially the huge pillow. It would be okay if it wasn’t for the rose. WHAT DOES SHE THINK IS HAPPENING.
Also, puppy!
Cat says
Haha, I saved my one from the flight between New Orleans and Texas because it was so crazy. They had toilet seats that your pet could use… I’m going to scan some of it.