Loves Me Not

There are two times of year that it is best to avoid lingerie shops – Christmas and Valentines. Both times of year (well, sort of one long stretch from October to mid February) brings out the same old red satin styles that most women wouldn’t buy for themselves. Christmas brings with it fluffy marabou trim (I’ve never quite understood the obsession with a girl dressing up like a sexy Mrs Claus*) and Valentines which has frills in abundance and unpractical pants (which you just know will end up being the only clean pair available when you’ve got an interview or something).

Ann Summers is probably the worst for this. They have three different lingerie sections this Valentines Day – Romantic*, Racy* and Raunchy*. Romantic is the pale pinks, frills and lace everywhere. Racy is thongs in blacks and reds, and Raunchy is all of the above but the material in them reduced down by about 50%. All of them though are likely to be opened with a “Oh…thats…nice” comment while the present recievee is thinking “He wants me to wear this?!”

Don’t get me wrong, I love new lingerie, but I think its definitely something best left to the person wearing it to buy it. It sounds a bit obvious, but they’re the ones who know exactly what they prefer! Boys – this Valentines, take your girlfriend shopping, don’t ever let the advertising campaigns or the sales women persuade you that your significant other does really want crotchless pants.*

* Erm…I do feel like I should point out that this hasn’t happened to me. The only present Alex has bought me that has gotten the side eye was the book of pole dancing moves he bought last Valentines Day from Las Vegas. I think the reaction was “Oh, erm, thats nice…what a shame we don’t have a pole!” then the book was put on one of the bulging bookshelves and forgotten about.